I need to throw a pity party for myself for a few minutes. So if you don't want to read then you might want to skip this blog post.
I really try to stay positive and try to make the best of being a mom of kids with special needs. Some days (most days), I end up feeling sad about my kids never growing up and having a normal live. Most people don't want to deal with me/my kids because they feel awkward or don't know what to say to me. I laugh at myself, because I really don't want them to say anything at all. I just sometimes might need a caring ear and understanding.
I laugh when moms say, oh it will get better or this faze will pass. I have been stuck in this same faze for 4 1/2 years!
My days consist of, running one child or the other to a therapy (or even 2 or 3 therapy's a day). Then I have to fight Elizabeth to eat,go to sleep,stay in the grocery cart etc.
It just doesn't seem fair ! What I would give to have my children tell me they love me or hug/kiss me and know what it means. What I would give to have a conversation with Elizabeth. Not an elaborate conversation or course but a I am hungry or I am sad or I need to poop. Or I want this or that. Instead she just whines all day. Anyways, I could go on and on.
Anyways, if you are still reading, I am sorry.
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I wish that I was there to help you out. I am amazed with the kind of moms that you and your Aunt Patrea (my mother-in-law) are to children that needs a mom everyday for everything. It takes strong women like you and her to make it possible. I know that your girls love you and they express in ways that they can and that may not be what might appear normal. I think you are doing a wonderful job with your children. I send all the hugs your way.
ReplyDeleteI have a friend named Nicole and I think you would really enjoy her blog. She too is a mother of two kids with special needs. She often writes about the same feelings you have. Her blog is http://twolittlereasons.blogspot.com/. I don't know if it will help, but she sure is inspiring to me. Love you!
ReplyDeleteYou can also get to from my blog if the link doesn't work.
DeleteI think you are an awesome mother Leah, and do such a great job with your kids. I know what you mean about fighting non-stop, even though Maddie is not special needs, the fights are about every detail of her day and it is exhausting, so I can imagine what it is like for you and how it is even more difficult. It's ok to have a pity party once in a while, we all need to have a place/time to vent.
ReplyDeleteThanks guys for the kind words.Jessica--- I will have to check out her blog.
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